You see the profile and your eyes grow wide: the photos look great! But…is it just the lighting? Is there a filter, making it look better than it is? You can’t tell. You swipe through the pictures, happy that there are a handful to view. You read the ad, and the details seem to be what you’re looking for. Sure, there are a few minor things that aren’t ideal, but you can overlook those. Right? Or should you hold out for the perfect one? (Is there such a thing?) What am I talking about? Buying a house? Online dating? Both. Each one has the potential to be rewarding: finding that hidden gem, the one you can’t believe hasn’t been scooped up and taken off the market.
They also both have the potential to be confusing and consuming as it can be tempting to look for perfection. Is it ok to dream about either? I know the perfect guy is a myth, as much as the perfect house in the perfect neighborhood at the perfect price. If “perfect” isn’t an option, are we faced with “good enough?” That doesn’t sound appealing, either. You have to weed through a lot of downers on the search. Is the guy still living in his parent’s basement, describing himself as “420 friendly?” Does the house look great in photos, but reeks of smoke the second you walk inside? You will need to figure out how much you should compromise, and what on your list is non-negotiable. Does he have kids? Does he seem goal-oriented? Does it need updates (the house? his wardrobe? Both doable, though they will cost you). Lately I’m seeing a lot of package deals on my current dating app: “I have a great career, just bought my own place, now looking to settle down with the right person.” I read the rest of the profile, and I’m pretty sure the house has more of a personality than the guy. Man, I’m being pretty hard on men! I look pretty boring on paper too, but once you get to know me, I’m a hoot. Or something more hip than that. One of the worst things is the bait-and-switch: the profile looks great, the details are on par, but first impressions are everything. I’ve been on house tours and first dates that really only needed to last a few minutes. That’s all it took for me to realize there was no future with either one. This is when house-hunting is easier than dating, because you can just ask your realtor if you can leave vs telling your date you’re going to leave. I heard a story once about a woman who crawled out a bathroom window to get out of a date. (And no, it wasn’t me). Now I’m envisioning doing that same thing on a house tour. I digress. And I want to say, I did just land a great condo that I was not expecting to find. It kind of dropped in my lap and I knew it was the one the second time I saw it. It’s not where I expected to live, but it feels like home. I was hesitant to commit to it, but now that I’m here, I can’t imagine anything else. I’m assuming love is the same way. (Awwhh). There are hesitations and unknowns, uncertainties and unideal situations. But you figure out what’s worth it and what’s not, looking past what you can if it’s the right fit.
1 Comment
10/8/2020 09:59:42 pm
Houses are where I make my living on. Well, I am a housing agent, and it is practically my career. I started pretty young, and I still believe that I have what it takes to keep on improving. I want to prove to my parents that I can match their expectation. I do not expect my family to be happy with it, but it is just what I want to do. I hope that I will get better at what I do.
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Amy WellnerEncouraging others to intentionally live out their God-given identity. Archives
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